Today, I want to share with
you an experience that I will always live with… Something that changed a bit of
me for better. I had written about it a few years back but I feel it doesn’t grow
old. The lesson I learnt was crucial and timeless. So here is what had happened…
Few years back, I was at the
movies one December night with a plan to watch a wonderful movie that was on my
“To watch List” for a really long time. I deliberately chose a late night show
so that the crowd wouldn’t be a hindrance in my movie time. I had waited for
months to be released and after waiting for 3 weeks of Advance bookings finally
I had tickets. Hence, with all the excitement packed up in a bucket of popcorn
and a big glass of cola, I entered the cinema hall. I was so excited that I had
selfishly chosen to go for the movie all alone.
The starting credits were
rolling and I heard this weird noise from the row behind mine. It was like a
cough and then about 15 minutes into the movie I heard another noise, something
between a cough and a sneeze, it was followed by a series of funny noises that
cannot be expressed in words. It repeated… while I was witnessing a nail biting
twist in the tale scene, the noise disturbed me (and by the many Tich – Tich sounds
around it had disturbed many others). Someone out there was barking mad to be
making those noises. I mean it was a public place and people had paid their
hard earned money to have some entertainment and some quality time with family
and romance a bit… you know people enjoy their time in every way possible in
the dark cinema hall… but that’s not the point! So amidst all that this person
was making these terrible noises.
Everyone looked in the
direction of the source, every time we heard that sound to find a normal
looking guy in a nice tee and jeans sitting in the corner seat and jerking his
neck. It was weird… he would just make these funny but disturbing noises. I was
getting towards the end of my rope really fast. I wanted to watch a movie, for
God sake! There I was a dedicated movie goer (by that I mean, I chose to go to
the cinema hall rather than download the gig) and here he was! Sitting in that
corner with “a cool guy look” and making these noises. And I must tell
you, there is nothing more annoying for
angry people more than the poise of the one who makes them angry. In this
case, the cool guy on whom I wish to
vent my fury. I sat through the torture of listening to those weird sounds and
thought, “Why shouldn’t I charge at him?” With half a mind to complain about
him or to him, whatsoever would make him stop, I got up from my seat. I was
unceremoniously shooed by the other people to make me sit down. “Everyone is
disturbed by those obnoxious sounds that man is making, and the one who wants
to stop those, is getting shooed! When did the world start being so unfair?” I
mumbled.
In the interval, I had had
enough. I walked up to him and yelled my head off at him, everything right from
what do you think of yourself to you are an insensitive fellow and how
inconsiderate of you to be making those noises… I said it all! To come to think
of it, yelling at someone feels good! Everything from little things to really
big stuff can be forgotten in the runt. I know, its not a good thing to do… but
I didn’t know it then. For that moment my love for the movie and frustration
with the noises got the better of me. And I felt good yelling at him! But a
bitter lesson learnt - No matter how great you feel, one must not forget that
Anger blinds you to the obvious! Only later do you realize that maybe you went
one too far! And that is exactly what happened!
That man just smiled at me
and said, “Please give me a chance to explain. I am sorry that you all are
getting disturbed but I cannot help it. For now, the movie is about to start
and I have waited for a really long time to watch this one. So now might not be
a good time. Why don’t you call me after the movie? This is my number.” He
handed me a contact card and continued, “And if you find it in your heart,
please watch this movie - Front of the Class when you find the time. It
explains my I am what I am.” he said with a smile.
Of course I wasn’t going to. But
something told me that I might want to know a little something about him. He
was not a weirdo who wanted to cause mayhem. He was equally passionate about
the movie. So I decided to do what many in my position would have done… Google
it. I found that the Movie was based on a Book by the same name. It is the
story of a teacher who had something called Tourette Syndrome. And in the 5
minutes that I had in hand before the second half of the movie started, I
googled Tourette Syndrome too.
And as I did, I found that I was
probably the most insensitive person there could be. I was an idiot to even
think that someone would get a demonic pleasure out of disturbing others. How
crazy would one have to be to oversee the tiny possibility that this person
might have some sort of an issue? I felt like kicking myself, but as they say,
neither can you pat your own back, nor can you kick yourself. Tourette Syndrome
is a neurological disorder that makes the brain send mixed signals to your body
and is completely involuntary. He didn’t like making those noises any more than
I liked hearing them. With my big foot in my even bigger mouth, I returned to
my seat.
I looked back at him, he smiled. I
did not have the courage to smile back at him.
After the movie I mustered the
courage to walk up to him and apologize.
“It’s okay. I get thrown out of
places a lot! I am glad I was not asked to leave this time. I love watching
movies and plays, but I cannot do so without these noises that are as they say “my
constant companion”. People mostly stare
at me, some frown, some call me crazy, some call me a jerk. Not many people understand
because not many people know about this condition. I don’t want to disturb
anyone, but I cannot help it.”
“I am sorry, I was one of the
many! I should have thought before I yelled.” I admitted.
I won’t lie. I felt bad… But like
I said people don’t understand because they don’t know. I was bullied at
school, even my elders and teacher had a hard time understanding me condition
and as a result I was rather unhappy. But as I grew, I learnt that being sad isn’t
worth it. So I never let any bad feelings get to me. I always remind myself
that people are scared of anything that’s different. Sometimes I act like a diva
and convince myself that they are jealous that someone amongst them has a
superpower and they don’t!”
I smiled.
“So they don’t accept the
different ones. But I say it’s okay to be different. And it’s okay to accept
the ones who are different.” I apologized again and left completely ashamed.
As I walked home, I realized that
he had indeed taught me something so profound that I felt like I was a changed
person. It is a thought worth thinking about, don’t be in a hurry to judge,
don’t be impatient to condemn someone because they are not like you, just wait
for a moment before you make a decision. Maybe, you are the one who needs a
different approach.
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